When I saw the full-bodied thickness of the delicious paints my eyes laughed out loud.  My fingers tingled at the deliciousness of the cotton-candy pink, lemony yellow, tiger lily orange, lusty magenta, ultramarine blue and the pre-schooler in me jumped to the surface to reach for a brush.

Moments later I had two brushes in one hand, one in the other and another in my mouth.  All fear of Not being a painter was gone (much of the time). I said later of this spiritually-charged experience that my body had shown up to hold the paint brushes for my soul. There were some struggles later into the program, for the most part though, that's how the whole experience (when I managed to get /stay out of my way) was.  Intuitive painting is soul being expressed in child-like freedom.  No judgements. No evaluation.  No comments … not even from myself.

What a concept. What an enormously peaceful feeling has been left deep in my core. I haven't painted … ever really.  I'm not a painter!  I'm a writer, a layout artist, a pattern-drafter, a textile artist!  I can't paint.  It never looks good, consequently it never feels good.  

The pieces I created during The Painting Experience thrill me.  Some because my breath is taken by the brilliance of my work. I am a painter!!! (Not really.  But better than I would have imagined.) Some of the pieces brought me to anger and rage by the 'ugliness' I had to work through to completion (with the gentle, yet provocative promptings of the facilitators). 

It's unlikely that I am now 'a painter'.  I am however, less afraid of making 'bad' art and more inclined to the playful dabble of paint.  And the quiet company of being in a group, yet working in a personal space that is protected from appraisal, has unchained the writer.  

Like any other calling, making a living as a Creative certainly necessitates a marketable excellence in one's craft.  Getting there, to one's calibre, through trust in one's inner intelligence is the essential part of the journey.

It's not about the product.  Its about the process – be the paint, be the brush, be now. Stay present.  Show up to the marks you are making on the paper – on life. Respect the work that only you can bring to life!